Is there something more going on and thats why she holds onto this one guy? Today I effectively told her that I cannot forget about her signing up on a dating website and breaking my trust if she wants to keep that guy around as a constant reminder as to why I cannot trust her. Her protestations of love don't amount to much when she is advertising her wares to the world at large. It's unfortunate that she can't muster the courage to make a decision and illuminate you on it, but perhaps she knows what I'm starting to suspect: I can already see my kids adopting this tenuous link to truth when they insist: Your relationship is on the rocks, and pretending it's just a teensy bit of emotional mud-slinging does you both an injustice. There's nothing less attractive than a willing victim, and you are setting yourself up with self-pitying statements like "I can't afford to be hurt any more". She added four random guys to her facebook and starting flirting with them. It's like I have proof without proof. If you dined as regularly as I do on so many similar states of lovers' despond, you too would develop a healthy cynicism for what's often erroneously described as the "reality" of the situation. She got defensive and said I was invading her privacy and why couldn't I trust her and now things won't be the same because I showed her a different side of me by "snooping. They video chat for hours, am I just blind to the truth?
Your challenge is to develop a sense of self-preservation and put an end to this sorry state of affairs. I asked him about this, and told him that while I had no wish to pry into his personal life, the question for me was whether he was looking to keep his options open for now, it being early days. This is just too surreal, and very mindnumbing. Your relationship is on the rocks, and pretending it's just a teensy bit of emotional mud-slinging does you both an injustice. I'm afraid you're guilty of this misdemeanour, as you're displaying the symptoms, including excessive interpretative tendencies, for all to see. She's trying to keep all her balls in the air until she has a replacement in mind, and that is cruelly prolonging your pain. We turn plain English into a foreign tongue laced with nuance at the tug of a heartstring. It is very kind of you to look for the best in this situation. It's a strange situation. She got defensive and said I was invading her privacy and why couldn't I trust her and now things won't be the same because I showed her a different side of me by "snooping. Well she blocked them all except for ONE guy who she keeps talking to. They video chat for hours, am I just blind to the truth? You may think the planet revolves around this girl, but it doesn't. We started seeing each other initially as friends — we have a lot of shared interests — and then one day he jumped on me and the relationship became increasingly physical. I found out she'd joined the day she moved in and was saying she was single, happy to go on dates to a restaurant, a walk, etc, and she gave a description of her ideal man as being someone who was younger than me, owned a pair of wellies and had a pet I have neither. Has anyone been in a similar situation? What if she simply said: I clicked on it and she was still signed in. Your girlfriend will either realise she has a lot to lose or be grateful for your emotional maturity in having the courage to quit. I'm so pissed and hurt right now. Your girlfriend is seeking pastures new. I'd go so far as to accuse you of being both extremely selective and obtuse about what you want to hear. My advice would be to unearth a spark of outrage at how you are being treated, then fan that small flame until it spurs you into taking responsibility for your own life and putting an end to this fast-ebbing liaison. It is true that lots of people set up online dating profiles without ever taking action or using them to meet someone. We love to make love a complicated business, and when it comes to emotions it is a challenge to marry them to rational thought. This has been most acutely demonstrated over the last week by the data dump from the Ashley Madison platform , which revealed that the site had millions of straight male subscribers, but very few women signed up.
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